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Showing posts with label Smile. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Smile. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 03, 2013
During the lifetime of Allah's Apostle dogs used to urinate and pass through the mosque. Nevertheless they never used to sprinkle water on it.

Bukhari: V1B4N174

“Our goal will not be to effect régime change, or alter the balance of power in Syria, or bring the civil war there to an end. We will simply do something random there for one or two days and then leave.„ — Obama


newyorker — The Borowitz Report
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Attempting to quell criticism of his proposal for a limited military mission in Syria, President Obama floated a more modest strategy today, saying that any U.S. action in Syria would have “no objective whatsoever.”

“Let me be clear,” he said in an interview on CNN. “Our goal will not be to effect régime change, or alter the balance of power in Syria, or bring the civil war there to an end. We will simply do something random there for one or two days and then leave.”

“I want to reassure our allies and the people of Syria that what we are about to undertake, if we undertake it at all, will have no purpose or goal,” he said. “This is consistent with U.S. foreign policy of the past.”

While Mr. Obama clearly hoped that his proposal of a brief and pointless intervention in Syria would reassure the international community, it immediately drew howls of protest from U.S. allies, who argued that two days was too open-ended a timeframe for such a mission.

That criticism led White House spokesman Jay Carney to brief reporters later in the day, arguing that the President was willing to scale down the U.S. mission to “twenty-four hours, thirty-six tops.”

“It may take twenty-four hours, but it could also take twelve,” Mr. Carney said.

“Maybe we get in there, take a look around, and get out right away. But however long it takes, one thing will not change: this mission will have no point. The President is resolute about that.”

Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Peace will come when the Arabs will love their children more than they hate us.

Golda Meir

For the IDF, every human life is worth saving


All human lives are worth saving – so the IDF teaches its soldiers. Israeli and Palestinian, Jew and non-Jew, soldier and civilian, in Israel and across the world. It doesn’t matter. When there is a person in need, the IDF will be there. Whether they are needed to provide emergency medical care, perform a daring rescue operation or evacuate survivors from under the rubble of a collapsed building – our soldiers will drop everything in order to save a life.

Why? The IDF’s code of ethics holds protecting human life and dignity as a supreme value. In the words of Sgt. Idan Ducach, who donated his bone marrow to save a young boy’s life, “if you save one life, its as if you saved an entire world.”

Here is the stark contrast between the MUSLIM CULT of DEATH, MISERY and DESPAIR and the JEWISH CREED of LIFE, HOPE and HAPPINESS
Distance is no obstacle

The Israeli Army’s Home Front Command is constantly preparing for scenarios in which it will be called upon to rescue Israeli citizens caught in disaster zones – whether they are natural or the result of enemy rocket fire.
IDF search and rescue soldier works through the rubble
But the IDF does not stop at Israelis when it comes to rescue missions. Search and rescue forces and expert medical troops have been sent by the IDF on humanitarian missions following natural disasters in the four corners of the globe. Emergency teams were sent to Haiti, Turkey, India, Mexico, Ghana and Japan among others.

In the past two decades of foreign aid missions, Israeli medical personnel have saved more hundreds of people from certain death, provided medical care to thousands of injured patients and delivered more than 47 babies in field hospitals. All Israeli delegations partnered with local and foreign medical teams in their efforts to save lives.
Friday, June 14, 2013
That married couples can live together day after day is a miracle that the Vatican has overlooked.

Bill Cosby

After two days trapped in freezing cold water and breathing from an air bubble in an upturned tugboat under the ocean, Harrison Okene was sure he was going to die. Then a torch light pierced the darkness.

I was calling on God. He did it.
Good news story spoiled by God taking credit for the survival and rescue of one person and no credit for his part in the murder of the 11 other people on the sunken boat. Again.

Which God? Obviously the Pastafarian God of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
Harrison Okene, 29, who survived for two days in a sunken boat off the coast of Africa.Ship's cook Okene, 29, was on board the Jascon-4 tugboat when it capsized on May 26 due to heavy Atlantic ocean swells about 32 kilometres off the coast of Nigeria, while stabilising an oil tanker filling up at a Chevron platform.

The fish came in and began eating the bodies. I could hear the sound. It was horror.
Sunday, June 09, 2013
We ask Thee for the booty of this town and its people. Forward in the name of Allah.' He used to say this of every town he raided.

Ishaq: 510

Selfridges robbery: 'Men in burkas' in 'smash and grab'

and

Knife-wielding woman wanted Cricket Cellular robbery - "in Muslim attire"

Two robberies - same day - with the weapon of choice: BURKA.
Anyone interested in buying a Burka Hire Franchise operation.
I am thinking of putting forward a business plan to my bankers: Burka Hiring Kiosks in shopping centers.


The scene of a smash and grab robbery in Selfridges,7 June 2013: Six men armed with axes have carried out a "smash-and-grab" raid at London's Selfridges department store.
Police said the robbers, reportedly dressed in burkas, smashed glass cabinets to steal high value watches.
Two suspects were later arrested when they came off a moped and members of the public stopped them fleeing.
The store in Oxford Street tweeted no-one was hurt in Thursday's robbery. The value of the stolen watches has yet to be established.
Police said the men fled the shop on mopeds and motorbikes ridden by associates.
Matthew Carrozo said he heard a moped crashing just under a mile away from Selfridges and saw one man dressed in full motorcycle gear while a second man dressed in a burka fell on to the ground.
"Fortunately no-one was injured. The store was very busy and this will have been a shocking thing for people to witness."
The raid took place 30 minutes before the department store was due to close at 21:00 BST.

and

WISTER - June 7, 2013 (WPVI) -- Philadelphia police are looking for the female suspect who they say robbed a Cricket Cellular store in the Wister section of the city.
It happened around 4:30 Thursday afternoon on the 5600 block of Germantown Avenue.
Police say the suspect entered the store, walked behind the counter and placed a 10 inch knife to the employee's back.
According to authorities, the woman said "Don't get in my way," and took an unknown amount of money from the register and a number of in-active cell phones from the counter.
The suspect placed the items in a large black bag with a reptile pattern on the side and fled south down Germantown Avenue on foot.
The woman is described as a black female, 5'2" tall, 140 pounds. She was last seen wearing dark Muslim attire and a silver belt.
Thursday, May 02, 2013
I asked Allah's Apostle about a person who imagined they passed wind during prayer. He replied: 'He should not leave his prayer unless he hears sound or smells something.

Bukhari: V1B4N139
Sorcery and Wizardry Manuals

Mehdi Taeb, who is close to Iranian Supreme Leader Ali Khamenei and heads Khamenei's Ammar Base think tank, said in April 2013 that the Jews are the most powerful sorcerers in the world today, and that they have used their powers to attack Iran – for instance by turning the U.S. into their tool and getting it to impose sanctions on Iran, and also through attempts, albeit failed, to interfere in the 2009 elections. He added that while Iran has so far withstood their assaults, they have not yet used the full scope of their powers against it.

In March 2013, the Rasanews.ir website, which is associated with the religious seminaries in Qom, posted an article about the status of sorcery and numerology in Jewish mysticism. According to this article, Jews cherish the knowledge of sorcery, pass it down from generation to generation, and believe that it can be used to control mankind, nature and even God's decisions.
Now this is a serious accusation against the Joooz that must be investigated. It was brought to light by an Iranian "think tank".

The Grand Kosher Wizard is Harry Potter-Cohen (peace be upon him.) Potter-Cohen utilises magic, supernatural and occult sorcery to control the Islamic world. Evidence has come to light that Potter-Cohen has cast a motza-ball spell to mush the brains of the Iranian "think tank" and all Iranian leaders.

Need I add anything here? Remember, these are the brain impaired manchildren who will soon have their finger on a nuclear trigger.

Today's news made by « memri » 
An Iranian regime official and a website close to the regime have recently accused the Jews of engaging in sorcery and of employing it against Iran.

In March 2013, the Rasanews.ir website, which is associated with the religious seminaries in Qom, posted an article about the status of sorcery and numerology in Jewish mysticism. According to this article, Jews cherish the knowledge of sorcery, pass it down from generation to generation, and believe that it can be used to control mankind, nature and even God's decisions.
Jews cherish the knowledge of sorcery, pass it down from generation to generation, and believe that it can be used to control mankind, nature and even God's decisions
The following are excerpts from Taeb's statements and from the article on Rasanews.ir.
Mehdi Taeb, Official Close to Khamenei: 'So Far, [The Jews] Have Not Used The Full [Scope Of] Their Sorcery Against Us'

Speaking on April 20, 2013 to students at a religious seminary in Ahwaz, Mehdi Taeb noted: "The Jews are currently subjecting us to an unprecedented trial. As you read in the Koran, [King] Solomon ruled the world… and God ordered a group of sorcerers to come out against him. The Jews have the greatest powers of sorcery, and they make use of this tool.
The Jews have the greatest powers of sorcery, and they make use of this tool.
"All the measures that have been brought against us originate with the Zionists. The U.S. is a tool in their hands. So far, they have not used the full [scope of] their sorcery against us. Sorcery was the final means to which they resorted during the Ahmadinejad era, but they were defeated. This ability of the Jews was eliminated by Iran. Five years ago they tried to oust Ahmadinejad [by this means]."[1]
So far, they have not used the full [scope of] their sorcery against us.
Rasanews.ir, Website Associated With Qom Seminaries: The Jews Believe They Can Use Sorcery To Control God's Decisions

The article on Rasanews.com, published March 7, 2013, stated: "The Jews have always tended to resort to divination, [a practice] that has its roots in astronomy, astrology and sorcery, [which they picked up] when they consorted with various peoples in the course of history. They cherished this [knowledge] like a treasure, generation after generation. In most cases, they base their predictions on the holy book [the Old Testament], especially on the book of Daniel, and they create an ideological climate in which the appreciation of sorcery and the yearning for it increase.
The Jews Believe They Can Use Sorcery To Control God's Decisions
"The [Jewish] people think that ruling over man, nature, and divine traditions can be achieved only by means of sorcery. They believe that it is possible to conquer nature and control the world, and even to control God's decisions, by using sorcery methods…
ruling over man, nature, and divine traditions can be achieved only by means of sorcery

"Sorcery is known to be a practice of which the divine books [i.e., the Old Testament, the New Testament and the Koran and] and the monotheistic religions disapprove. But Jewish mysticism regards it as a [legitimate] means to uncover the secrets of the holy book [the Old Testament]."[2]


Sunday, April 28, 2013
Believers, take not for friends your fathers and your brothers if they love disbelief above belief. If you do, you do wrong. Say: If your fathers, your sons, your families, your wives, relatives and property which you have acquired, and the slackness of trade which you fear and dwellings which you like, are dearer to you than Allah and His Messenger and striving hard, fighting in His Cause, then wait till Allah brings about His torment.

Qur'an 9:23

If Muslims do not wish to accept another culture, the answer is simple; “STAY WHERE YOU ARE!!” “Or go back to where you were!”
Muslim immigrants leave their countries of birth because of civil and political unrest “CREATED BY THE VERY NATURE OF THEIR CULTURE.”

The Dutch government says it will abandon the long-standing model of multiculturalism that has encouraged Muslim immigrants create a parallel society within the Netherlands.
The government shares the social dissatisfaction over the multicultural society model and plans to shift priority to the values of the Dutch people.
Courageous little nation. YES they can... so can YOU.
Blast your politicians until they grow a pair and follow the Netherlands example.

Today's news made by « conservativepapers » 
The Netherlands , where six per cent of the population is now Muslim, is scrapping multiculturalism.

The Dutch government says it will abandon the long-standing model of multiculturalism that has encouraged Muslim immigrants create a parallel society within the Netherlands ..

A new integration bill, which Dutch Interior Minister Piet Hein Donner presented to parliament on June 16, reads:

“The government shares the social dissatisfaction over the multicultural society model and plans to shift priority to the values of the Dutch people.
“The government shares the social dissatisfaction over the multicultural society model and plans to shift priority to the values of the Dutch people.
In the new integration system, the values of the Dutch society play a central role.”

With this change, the government steps away from the model of a multicultural society.

The letter continues: “A more obligatory integration is justified because the government also demands that from its own citizens.

It is necessary because otherwise the society gradually grows apart and eventually no one feels at home anymore in the Netherlands ..
The new integration policy will place more demands on immigrants.
With this change, the government steps away from the model of a multicultural society.
For example, immigrants will be required to learn the Dutch language and the government will take a tougher approach to immigrants who ignore Dutch values or disobey Dutch law.”

The government will also stop offering special subsidies for Muslim immigrants because, according to Donner;
“It is not the government’s job to integrate immigrants.” (How bloody true).
The government will introduce new legislation that outlaws forced marriages and will also impose tougher measures against Muslim immigrants who lower their chances of employment by the way they dress.
More specifically, the government will impose a ban on face-covering, Islamic burqas as of January 1, 2013.
The government will introduce new legislation that outlaws forced marriages and will also impose tougher measures against Muslim immigrants who lower their chances of employment by the way they dress.
More specifically, the government will impose a ban on face-covering, Islamic burqas as of January 1, 2013.

Holland has done that whole liberal thing, and realized – maybe too late – that creating a nation of tribes will kill the nation itself.

The future of Australia , the United States , UK and Canada may well be read here.

NOTE: Muslim immigrants leave their countries of birth because of civil and political unrest “CREATED BY THE VERY NATURE OF THEIR CULTURE.”

Countries such as Holland , Canada , the UK and Australia have an established way of life that actually works, so why embrace the unworkable?

If Muslims do not wish to accept another culture, the answer is simple; “STAY WHERE YOU ARE!!” “Or go back to where you were!”
Friday, April 12, 2013
And Allah taught Adam all the names as follows: He taught him the name of everything, down to fart and little fart.

Tabari I:267

Mayor of the city, told media that a ban was needed, as farting does not go well with the Islamic values of modesty. “Muslim women are not allowed to fart with sound, it’s against Islamic teachings,”

The offender could receive 20 lashes for small farts and up to 3 months prison time for larger ones.

Thank you Allah! You are a funny god. Inshallah!
"Muslim women are not allowed to fart with sound... quiet farts are lawful".
Naturally men are exempt from these draconian restrictions - they are still allowed to exhale in a resonant baritone. The Fart Police will be issued with decibel counters and sample air-bags.
Today's news made by « sheikyermami. » 
An Islamic city council in the Indonesian province of Aceh, which follows Sharia, has banned female citizens from passing gas.

Fart bannedSayyid Yahia, mayor of the city, told media that a ban was needed, as farting does not go well with the Islamic values of modesty. “Muslim women are not allowed to fart with sound, it’s against Islamic teachings,” he said. Meanwhile, the Indonesian Feminists Association told local media they will attempt to block the smelly law as they deem it discriminatory.



Talking to The Wadiyan, mayor Sayyid Yahia said the law aims to save people’s morals and behaviors. “When you see woman fart loud, she appears like a man. But if she sit sideways and pass it quietly, she looks like a woman,” Sayyid said.

Although the proposed law does not ban “quiet fart,” passing gas with sound is actually not uncommon in Southeast Asia, particularly for women consuming potatoes and peas. Obviously, women maintain that they feel healthier, farting loud. Fathima Khan, a medical doctor at the Al Banni Islamic Hospital in Aceh’s capital is critical of the proposed law: “There is no need to question this practice, let alone regulate it, because people do it for their health and safety,” she said.

The mayor declined to give The Wadiyan details of what the punishment would be for violators. While another member at the City council, who wished not to be named, said if convicted by the sharia court, the offender could receive 20 lashes for small farts and up to 3 months prison time for larger ones.

On another note, the local Islamic scholars were mostly divided over the law. Well-known Muslim activists like Bshar Abdulla voiced his objection, “How to pass gas is not regulated in Sharia. There is no mention of it in the Koran,” he said on his Twitter account. However, “the Islamic tradition and the values of modesty does not support women farting loud,” said Mehmood Hussain, a scholar and stench supporter of the law.

Under the new regulation, the mayor says that only women in the public space are going to be monitored. “It will be the responsibility of the husband to make sure that his wife upholds Islamic values at home”. He also argued that there is no scientific evidence supporting health benefits of passing gas, in Koran.

The City council will be evaluating the regulation in a week, after which it could turn into a by-law.
Saturday, March 23, 2013
Islam is so funny! Betcha didn't know that the Devil was the world’s first singer. So anyone who listens or plays music is therefore evil.” 

Holy shit... so crooning is out. I wonder... maybe... warbling...
yodeling... a bit of coy humming. Obviously that grating Islamic nasal whining from the minarets is not music to anyone's ears so that's OK with Allah the most gracious and merciful.


YouTube Reaches 1 Trillion Racist Comments

“It’s hard to even comprehend how many completely ignorant comments 1 trillion is. We’re truly humbled by our dedicated and extremely uneducated users who make such vile and imperceptive statements each and every day. Thank you, everyone.”
theonion

SAN BRUNO, CA—The Silicon Valley headquarters of YouTube reportedly erupted in cheers shortly after 10 a.m. local time Thursday as the popular video-sharing service celebrated the 1 trillionth racist comment posted to its website. “When we created YouTube back in 2005, we knew it had the potential to revolutionize the way people make highly offensive and insensitive remarks based purely on a stranger’s racial or ethnic characteristics, but we never dreamed we would make it to 1 trillion of these repugnant comments,” said CEO Salar Kamangar, noting that the milestone comment “ching chong,” posted by user StinkFingaz below a video of a Japanese man painting, would be commemorated on a large bronze plaque in the company’s offices. “It’s hard to even comprehend how many completely ignorant comments 1 trillion is. We’re truly humbled by our dedicated and extremely uneducated users who make such vile and imperceptive statements each and every day. Thank you, everyone.” Kamangar confirmed that reaching the milestone had reinforced the company’s commitment to expanding its servers later this year, which will allow the site to handle up to 1 million “fucking faggot” comments every second.
Friday, March 22, 2013
Polish Pastafarians vow to fight for legal recognition as a legitimate faith

We encourage all our readers to convert. Wearing a pasta strainer on your head is far more utilitarian than wearing a headscaff, yarmulka, or the Pope's, funny hat.

freethinker

Two years ago an Austrian Pastafarian won the right on to be photographed wearing a pasta strainer on his head for his driving licence photograph.


Austrian Pastafarian Niko Alm
POLISH members  the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster are apparently facing opposition from the authorities, who are loathe to recognise it as a bona fide religious entity.
This, Pastaparians say, is tantamount to discrimination, and, in a statement posted on its website, the Polish branch of the church, which believes the world was created by a pasta-based entity, pointed out that all faiths faced persecution at their inception, and that the Polish state had underestimated its believers’ faith in “His Noodliness”.
The statement added:
Do not be afraid, as it will only be a matter of time before our community is registered as a religious association.
It added it will first appeal to the Polish supreme court.
If that doesn’t work:
We declare that we will bring a complaint to the European Court of Human Rights in Strasbourg.
Although it claims to have existed in quiet anonymity for hundreds of years, the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster first emerged into the public eye in 2005 during a dispute over a decision by the Kansas Education Board to allow the teaching of “intelligent design” as a counter-measure to creationism.
It has since then attracted widespread publicity on numerous occasions, mainly through the actions of “Pastafarians,” as the devotees of the church call themselves.
Two years ago an Austrian Pastafarian won the right on to be photographed wearing a pasta strainer on his head for his driving licence photograph. He had argued that a refusal to allow him to wear the kitchen accessory would violate his religious freedom.
Austrian Pastafarian Niko Alm
The New Jersey Motor Vehicle Commission weren’t that accommodating. In February it refused to allow Pastafarian Aaron Williams to renew his licence wearing a colander on his head.
Williams complained:
Had it been a turban or a head scarf, or something from a mainstream religion, then it would’ve been fine. I guess since they hadn’t heard of the religion, that’s why they opposed it. But that’s not really acceptable to me. They’re not in a position to discriminate against religions that are mainstream, or not mainstream, just because they may not have heard about it.
Westboro-house-rainbow-paint-gawker-cropped-proto-custom_28This sort of official disapproval rests on  suspicions that far from being a legitimate religion the “church” amounts to little more that an irreverent mockery of established faiths and churches.
But Pastafarians remain undaunted by bureaucratic disdain. In a rallying call to the faithful, the Polish branch said:
Brother and sister, let us join together in the faith. Together we can overcome the difficulties and low carbohydrates, and fill the uncompromising hearts of civil servants with a portion of penne.
In other bizarre news today, we learn that the notorious “God Hates Fags” Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka, Kansas, has acquired an unwelcome new neighbour  – a gay rights centre decked out in rainbow colours.
The centre, opposite the despicable Phelps family church, is the brainchild of Aaron Jackson, 31, whose other projects have included opening orphanages in India and Haiti and buying a thousand acres of endangered rain forest in Peru. This year, his charity, Planting Peace, also intends to de-worm every child in Guatemala.
Jackson said  he had been looking for a way to support equality, anti-bullying programmes, and some sort of pro-LGBT initiative.
Monday, March 18, 2013
It's all right, Fido, I know exactly how you're feeling

Get a dog!

Angry Shih Tzu Any dog owner will claim they can tell exactly what their pet is feeling just by looking at it. Scientists now say they may well be right. A study has shown that people are able to identify precisely a range of emotions in dogs from changes in their facial expressions. The research shows that volunteers could correctly spot when a dog was happy, sad, angry, scared, surprised and disgusted when shown only a picture of the animal's face, suggesting that humans are naturally attuned to detecting how animals feel.
Basset hound puppy
Sad
Research leader and psychologist Tina Bloom said: ''There is no doubt that humans have the ability to recognise emotional states in other humans and accurately read other humans' facial expressions. ''We have shown that humans are also able to accurately - if not perfectly - identify at least one dog's facial expressions. ''Although humans often think of themselves as disconnected or even isolated from nature, our study suggests that there are patterns that connect, and one of these is in the form of emotional communication,'' Dr Bloom said. The study, published in the journal Behavioural Processes, used photographs of a police dog as it experienced different emotions, which were shown to 50 volunteers. By far the easiest emotion they recognised was happiness, with 88 per cent correctly identifying it. Anger was identified by 70 per cent of participants. About 45 per cent spotted when the dog was frightened, while 37 per cent could identify the relatively subtle emotion of sadness. The expressions that were hardest for humans to identify were surprise and disgust.
Guilty dog
Endearing
The researchers at Walden University in Minneapolis found that people with minimal experience of dogs were better at identifying disgust and anger, perhaps because dog owners convinced themselves that their dog was not aggressive and so the associated facial expression was just playing. ''I am not at all surprised that science has finally accepted what we knew all along,'' Dogs Today editor Beverley Cuddy said. ''Dog and owner communicate perfectly well without words.''  Thanks to SMH





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